A friend in my local fibro support group asked a fairly common question about how you deal with family who just don't get that your energy level varies, they don't get that you really DO hurt and that you really DON'T have any energy. How do you communicate your needs when you have chronic illness … [Read more...]
Things to Say to Someone with Chronic Illness
If you love someone with chronic illness, you want to show them you care. There are plenty of lists of things that you shouldn't say, things that aren't helpful to them or to your relationship. But, more important are the things that you should say to someone with chronic illness. These are the … [Read more...]
Have you let Pain take your Identity?
How much of your identity revolves around your illness? Around your pain? How do you describe yourself? If I asked you to describe yourself to me right now, what would you say? Would you include your pain and illness in that description? When you live with chronic pain, sometimes that pain is … [Read more...]
How to Help Your Chronically Ill Friend Feel Worse
Do you have a friend with chronic illness? Do you want to make them feel worse? No, I don't think you do. You probably want to make them feel better. If that's the case, you really shouldn't do the things on this list. But, there's a good chance that no matter how much you love them you've done one … [Read more...]
Who are we to judge another’s illness?
How many times have you seen a comment from someone on social media commenting on how someone else with an illness can't possibly have it as bad as they claim (or as the author of the status). I ran across the below "migraine status" meme on Instagram. "If you're typing a status update that … [Read more...]
The Importance of Asking For Help
Too often we don't ask for help because we assume that others will not be there for us, or that even if they want to be there, they won't be able to help. The problem is that we'll never know if we can depend on others if we never ask. This quote came straight from my Psych book: "Social support … [Read more...]
We just want a little empathy and understanding
There are three things those of us living with chronic pain need more than anything else - acknowledgement, empathy, and understanding. Yet, too often these are the things are lacking most. "The worst thing about having an invisible illness is that people have a very hard time believing you … [Read more...]
It’s ok to ask for help
How many times have we been told that we need to learn to ask for help, that we need to be willing to ask for help? Yet, no matter how often we hear it, the asking is still a struggle. We all struggle in different ways, with asking for different things. For some of us, we can easily ask for help … [Read more...]
Asking For Help is Giving a Gift
As difficult as it is to ask for help, most of us loved to be asked. We often get confused and think that we are handing someone a burden when we ask them for help, but really when we ask for help, we are giving them a gift. I love to read and books often inspire me, especially non-fiction. … [Read more...]
When you realize you are the toxic person in the situation
Have you ever thought about a situation and realized that maybe you were the one making the situation bad? That maybe in a relationship or situation you were the toxic person? Sometimes I read back through something I've written in the past and receive a punch to the gut. That's what happened as … [Read more...]