Do you ever find yourself wishing your life away? Constantly thinking if I can just get to the weekend, or just get through this month, or get past this or that, things will get better? It’s a terrible place to be isn’t it?
This is something I’ve been struggling with lately as I’ve dealt with all this stress surrounding selling the house and moving.
Wishing My Life Away
My guy and I were talking about this, about how it started back in January with “if we could just skip ahead 6 months” and get past all the work we were having to do around the house. And, it’s not stopped since.
Then last week we were talking about how we wish we could just skip to the end of the month. Closing is scheduled for June 25th and it just can’t get here fast enough.
Funny to think that our 6 month target hasn’t changed. It was the end of June then and it’s still the end of June. Perhaps I can see the future? LOL.
We thought that we’d have some time to rest after we got the house ready and on the market. Figured on a month or two of waiting for a contract and we were so looking forward to some rest during that month. A weekend to just relax and do nothing at all.
Of course, that didn’t happen. Because that’s not the way that life works. I got a contract he first day the house was on the market, and it’s been non-stop since then of trying to get the rest of my stuff moved.
Then, just when we think that’s under control the buyer tells me he isn’t interested in keeping my appliances (after initially saying he wanted to buy them – no it wasn’t in the original contract), so I had to deal with selling those.
So, again, no weekend to just rest and relax. And, here we find ourselves again just looking forward to it being over so we can rest, and have it all behind us.
Enjoy the Moment
Instead of wishing for the passage of time, I need to remember to be in each moment, to enjoy them for what they are. Yes, there may be stress that I’d love to not “enjoy” but there is so much more going on beyond that and when I get stuck in the mode of thinking forward I’m not enjoying those little moments, because I’m not there, I’m somewhere off in the future.
There have been many small moments that I’ve probably missed in the last 6 months because I’ve been so consumed with doing and with getting through this period.
Looking back it makes me realize just how many moments I’ve missed throughout my life as I spent so much time wishing for time to pass.
I had years where I just spent each day wishing for it to be bedtime so the day would end and I could escape for a while. I’d spend my time looking forward to whatever big thing was coming, whether it was an end to something (finishing school) or a vacation.
I spent so much time focused on those things that I missed so much along the way. My time in Mindfulness Based Stress Relief really helped me and I found that for almost two years after taking that course I was much more attuned to the little moments. To being mindful of even the smallest moments.
But, without focused practice, that habit fell away. I found that I was purposely meditating less and less often, and as a result that default mindfulness slipped away. Instead of really savoring a meal, or just time sitting, or whatever small thing, I began rushing, or just doing without really thinking.It's so easy to get caught up in hoping things are better tomorrow that we don't stop to appreciate what is good about today.
I’m trying to get back to being in the moment. I’ve been making more of an effort to meditate daily, as well as whenever I start feeling anxious. Meditation is a great way to deal with anxiety IN THE MOMENT. Sadly, my default is often distraction instead of meditation. It’s something I’m working on.
While distraction can be a great tool for dealing with pain. It’s not good for dealing with anxiety. It doesn’t reduce anxiety, it just puts it off, and sometimes makes it worse.
I’ve been trying to take more time to meditate. When I feel anxious, instead of getting sucked up in the anxiety, or trying to distract myself from it by playing a game or surfing the web on my phone, I instead try to do 10 minutes of meditation.
I’ve really been enjoying the Insight Timer app as it has so many great meditations for just about any purpose you can think of.
Don’t let all the moments pass you by while you are striving to get through the week. Remember to stop and savor the wonder that surrounds you, the time with your loved ones, the soft fur of your fur-baby, the warmth of the sun on your skin, and the smell of your favorite dish cooking (or being delivered).Don't let all the moments pass you by while you are striving to get through the week. Remember to stop and savor the wonder that surrounds you Click To Tweet