Sunday Inspiration: When Everything is Going Wrong, Be Thankful

The last thing anyone fighting any chronic illness wants to hear is that someone else has it worse than you do. It really doesn’t matter that your illness might not potentially be your cause of death, it has lead to the end of your life (as you know it). Our lives will end dozens (if not hundreds) of times before we finally die. Every time we hit a wall and lose the life we expected to lead, life ends. But, with each ending comes a new beginning, a new chance to learn and a new chance to grow, and that is why we should be thankful.

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When I started writing this post, inspired by a post on Marc and Angel Hack Life’s post “8 Things to Remember When Everything is Going Wrong“, I had a completely different idea of the direction the post would go. My first thought was about how my week last week had gone so wrong, I’d gotten a couple of really terrible grades and it had me down, my shoulder is being a major pain again, etc. So, when I stumbled across this post again I thought it was timely for me personally, and probably for you, as well. So, let’s take a closer look at a few of their suggestions from the perspective of a chronic illness that isn’t going anywhere.

1. Pain is Part of Growing – One of my best friends in the world reminded me of something last week. If it were not for being sick, I would not be doing any of the things I’m doing right now. I might have finished a double major in Marketing and Psych by now (as I’d intended 5 years ago), but I wouldn’t be writing this blog and (hopefully) helping others in the way that I do. For me, pain had quite literally been part of growing into the person I am. It’s been responsible for teaching me to forgive, to not hold grudges, and to just move on. There’s too little life to be hanging on to the negative. If it weren’t for chronic illness I would not be pursuing writing, I wouldn’t have even considered it an option. I’ve definitely grown a lot due to my illness and the pain it has brought me. Sure, I’d rather not have the pain, but I’m actually pretty happy despite the pain.

2. Everything in Life is Temporary – except chronic illness. I’m pretty sure that’s how every single one of finish that platitude when we read it now. It’s easy to think that everything is temporary until you are faced with something that isn’t. Then again, I guess even chronic illness is temporary, eventually even it will come to an end. It doesn’t do us much good though, since we won’t be around to wave goodbye to it. The only positive I can give you here is that there will be days when it hurts less, when your illness is not as noticeable, and if it weren’t for the days when it’s worse we would likely take the good days for granted. I know I’ve done it, when I’ve been doing really well for a while, it’s actually pretty easy to forget what it was like to be really sick. Then my body brings me back with a, not so gentle, reminder. On those days I’m quite happy to remember that the pain at that level is temporary. I know it’s hard to remember that when it’s been hurting at a 10 for months on end. All we think about is that it’s only likely to get worse. As, I sit here typing this now with my shoulder firing up again and no idea what is causing the pain, that is the thought that keeps recurring. It’s been worse and it scares me that it might get to that point again, but I’m thankful that right now it’s not.

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3. Worrying and Complaining Changes Nothing –  WRONG! – I’ll agree that worrying changes nothing. It only builds negativity that likely increases the pain. If I let myself get focused on how much my shoulder hurts, it actually starts to hurt worse. Worrying does change something, just not for the positive. Complaining can change things, too. In fact, sometimes it can make you feel better. Sometimes just saying what is on your mind, just expressing the pain and the worry makes it actually feel a lot better. As my shoulder pain increases and I worry that it might continue to do so, there are many other worries that come with it related to how it will impact life, school, my marriage. Just expressing those worries to my husband actually made me feel a lot better, just getting them out there. There’s nothing he can do about my pain, but letting him know my concerns and worries made me feel better, because I wasn’t bottling them up and holding them in anymore.

[Tweet “Stop worrying and start complaining, it’ll make you feel better.”]

4. Scars are Symbols of Your Strength – I was reading through a number of the Fibro Warrior Interviews recently and I noticed one trend. Almost every single person I’ve interviewed has commented that they have discovered that they are much stronger than they ever thought they were.

I’m going to leave it at those four, but take a look at their whole list and let me know what you think about their suggestions. I know it’s difficult to look beyond the platitudes sometimes and find how these suggestions can apply to your life. But, no matter what life serves us there is always something to be thankful for. So, when life throws you lemons, just be thankful they weren’t baseballs – because those suckers hurt when they hit you in the head!