Changing Your Perception of Chronic Pain

Perceptions of control make a difference.People who think they have more control show less response to stress.

{Stress}may be less intense among those who think of them as challenges to be overcome.

Many stressful events are not inherently stressful. Their impact depends partly on how people perceive them. An important aspect of this appraisal is the degree to which the stressors are perceived to be predictable or controllable.

 

These are all quotes from my Psychology notes, on the topic of “Stress, Health, and Coping”. When I wrote them and read them I could only think of how perfectly they paralleled to our lives living with chronic pain. Most of us with Fibromyalgia are, let’s be honest here, Type-A Control Freaks. I hate to admit it, and if anyone tells my husband I did, I’ll deny it. But, I like to feel like I’m in control. When we get knocked down by chronic illness we lose our sense of control. However, there are some small things we can do to regain that feeling of control.

Changing Your Perception of Chronic Pain

1. It’s All About Perception – Note that first comment. “people who think they have more control show less response to stress.” Sometimes just knowing we have pain meds on hand can actually reduce our pain levels, so that we need the pain meds less. Why? Because we feel in control. When we feel like we “have to do something” (run an errand, go to a family event, etc) it stresses us much more than when we feel like we have a choice in the matter. Just that feeling of “have to” adds a layer of stress, and stress increases our pain and fatigue.
   [Tweet “Changing your perception of control can reduce your pain.”]Instead of thinking about that family event as something you HAVE to attend, and all the negatives of it. Think about it as a positive event, as something that you are choosing to do. Because, the reality is that you are choosing to go. Think about why you are choosing to go. Is it because it will make someone happy to see you? It is because it will make you feel good to know that you made the effort? In The Happiness Project: , Gretchen Rubin talks about how she changed her perception of planning her daughter’s birthday parties. They were a lot of work and something she never really looked forward to. But, she shifted her thinking by thinking about how she’d feel if someone else was planning it. She wouldn’t be happy. That allowed her to realize that she did want to do it and that it did make her happy, even if it created a little stress.
2. It’s a Challenge to be Won! – Admit it, you enjoy a good challenge. You enjoy WINNING! Look at the health issues you’ve been “blessed” with not as something that will bring you down, but as a challenge to be won. This gives you new energy to fight for another day. Challenge yourself with small goals, and build on your accomplishments. Instead of spending your day focusing on what you are not getting done, think about the things that you have accomplished, no matter how small.
   Got out of bed – check!
   Took a shower – check!
   And don’t get hung up on the little things you don’t do. Who cares if you shaved your legs in the shower, anyway? And that load of towels that never gets folded, obviously life went on with unfolded towels. (I know it does in my house!)
3. Control What You Can, Ignore the Rest – We can’t control everything, but each little thing we can control does actually decrease our stress. So, if there’s some little thing you are unable to control that is driving you crazy. Change your perception. Find a way to tell yourself that you do have control over that little thing. Towels not getting folded? Tell yourself that you chose not to fold the towels. Heck, why bother they are just going to get unfolded, used, and thrown back in the wash anyway!
   [Tweet “Control what you can, ignore the rest!”]

Whenever I think of perception I’m always reminded of one of my favorite scenes in any movie – Dead Poet’s Society, when Robin Williams challenges the students to get up on top of the desks (at 1:45) and look at the room from a different perspective. He changed the way they thought, and that movie changed the way I think. Sometimes, I forget just how important it can be to change your perspective, but it’s a fact I remind myself of as often as I can.

I had to come back and edit this after I saw this TedX video on Brainless Blogger that fit perfectly with what I wrote about here. Go watch it!